and I am struggling to get one out for next week's class, and you have been writing one a day. I am blaming the fact that I've been trying to rhyme. I think yours is very natural - and works because you didn't rhyme.
I think the first stanza is perfect. I wondered in the second if 'when morning comes' followed by the two 'ands' together might work better with 'in the morning/ when sense and understanding return'. I love the two tercets ending - and the sentiment.
Another sonnet!
and I am struggling to get one out for next week's class, and you have been writing one a day. I am blaming the fact that I've been trying to rhyme. I think yours is very natural - and works because you didn't rhyme.
I think the first stanza is perfect. I wondered in the second if 'when morning comes' followed by the two 'ands' together might work better with 'in the morning/ when sense and understanding return'. I love the two tercets ending - and the sentiment.